So now that I'm home and officially over the jet lag I thought it would be nice to jot down a few thoughts and memories before my feeble old mind forgets everything. I want to go through the last few hours in Ghana and my travels home. Let's start with leaving the hotel with Brandie, Mighty, and Agbesi (yes, we can now reveal their real names since we're past court and officially our children!).
We arrived back at the home and came to the front gate since I had the taxi full of my suitcases. When the gates swung open all of the children immediately noticed this time would be different. We rolled in the two bigger suitcases and I had my backpack on my back. When we set the two bigger bags to the side by John's old room I just wanted to go and take my usual spot out underneath the big, shady mango tree. I was trying to be a total sponge and just soak up every last look of the kids, remember everything they were doing, and trying to avoid thinking about that knot starting to grow in my stomach with every passing minute.
The kids realized our time was short too. Mighty just wanted to be held and talk. Agbesi was trying to avoid the issue by just staying out of sight. He went to his room to play with his friends, while Mighty and I just sat on the chair and talked. It was actually just the opposite I thought would have happened. It was so nice just to hold my little girl for the first time as my official second daughter. We talked about how long it would be before we'd come back, what to expect when she arrived in America, and what she needed to be doing to prepare herself for that day. There's a lot she has to learn so that she'll feel comfortable when she arrives to her new home.
Many of the other children had pulled up chairs around us, found a little piece of my lap, or sat on the ground beside my chair. They listened to Mighty and me talk and every once in a while they'd interject their own question or thought. The tempo and volume of the conversation was much different than any other I'd heard over the last two and a half weeks. Everyone knew what was coming - no one wanted to think about it. I, of course had much more anxiety about simply leaving. I was questioning our decision of leaving Brandie in country without me. I knew she'd be OK since there were other American girls and the big boys would protect them like their own mothers, but there was still that nervous feeling - kind of like you get before a big final exam or something.
After about two hours of just sitting and absorbing the last remaining seconds with all these beautiful children Nana (the crazy taxi driver) finally appeared out of the darkness behind the home. As soon as the kids noticed who it was the air grew tense. Mighty buried her little face in my chest and started sobbing. She didn't say anything - but then again...she didn't have to. I was feeling the exact same way - maybe without the fear she was sure to be feeling - but I knew exactly what she was thinking. Part of me just wanted to jump up, grab my stuff, and head out the gate - just to get it over with. The other part of me knew this would be the last time I'd see some of these kids. Some of the older boys we'd grown to love and admire would be in school miles away when we returned. Some of the children would be gone to their new homes. It was a sad reality of leaving.
I told Mighty we should go say good-bye to all the other children and then she and I could walk to the back of the house and talk for a few minutes more before I left. She painfully agreed. I first walked up stairs to find Agbesi. I was still a little shocked he hadn't come down in such a long time. I found him in his room quietly playing with his friends and his new transformer car we'd brought him. I motioned for him to come out in the hallway. As he approached me I bent down to hug my little buddy for the last time for the next couple months. I told him again how much I loved him and that I promised to come back as soon as we could. He looked at me, held up his two little fingers and said, "Two months!" and then looked into my eyes for some sort of reassurance he was right. I smiled and said, "That's right...two months." I put him down, kissed him on the forehead and then watched him walk back into the room and start playing again.
Hmmmm, that wasn't so bad. Certainly not as bad as I thought it was going to be.
Mighty was still clung to my waist as we descended the stairs. When I reached the bottom of the stairs two of the older girls were standing there - D and E. Brandie and I had created a special bond with both of these girls. D is coming home to Nampa with one of our closest friends (hopefully only a month or two after Mighty). She is such a sweet, thoughtful girl - one of my favorites in the orphanage. E is being adopted by our new close friends the Livingstons. Anytime we'd spent time with Monica outside of the home, E was with us. We'd gotten to know her well also. The two girls were waiting for me at the bottom of the stairs. I looked over at D and noticed she was already crying too. I reached out and hugged her - Mighty wouldn't move so I had both of them in my warm embrace. E came closer - I grabbed her too - and told all three of them how special they were. I told them I knew that God loved each of them and that I loved each of them. At that special moment - while I was holding three crying little girls - I looked up to see Peter and little Richard standing there looking at me with eyes welling up with tears.
I didn't know how much longer I could take this! I'm not an emotional man and for whatever reason I really dont' cry, but at this moment my eyes felt like they were on fire and thought my heart was going to rip out of my chest. I grabbed these two special little boys - the two I'd been privileged enough to feel the Savior's love for over the last two weeks - and hugged them both tightly. I told them I loved them, that I knew their families were coming very quickly, that I knew many, many people who were praying for them, and that they should continue to be good boys. I knelt down in the dark doorway to the courtyard, surrounded by a group of children, and just hugged them all for what seemed like a few minutes. I felt their little bodies tremble as they silently weeped. I told them I'd return soon and would be so happy to see them again. I stood back up and slowly turned for the back of the house.
As I turned from the lighted courtyard and into the dark shadows of the back yard - with Mighty still firmly attached to my hip - I heard the approach of two little feet running fast. As I turned around to see who was coming I caught the last bit of light reflect of Agbesi's wet little cheeks. He ran toward me and jumped into my arms. I stood there hugging both of my two little kids - these two special kids that, for whatever reason God had chosen for us to raise, these two little kids we now loved as deeply as our other four children - and told them both how much I loved them and how excited I was to finally get them home with us.
Both of the kids walked outside the gate and stood by the taxi. Brandie stood in the gateway. I went back to her, hugged her, and kissed her on the cheek. I told her I loved her. I could tell she was anxious about the next few days. As always she was questioning her abilities - even though everyone else around her sees what a powerful person she is. I held her and didn't want to let go. She's always been my rock - the one I could always count on...and now I had to leave her in a foreign country too. At that moment, everything just didn't seem fair.
I quickly turned and headed for the car. As I sat in the dark front seat of the car I looked back to see my buddies crammed into the back seat. Big Richard, Sammy, and Junior were coming with to make sure I was taken care of properly. I looked at Nana and said, "Nana - you drive! And listen - I want to arrive to America in one piece - you got it? Since I've been in Ghana I've been in two wrecks, gone to the hospital twice, watched my taxi driver get hauled off to jail, got robbed, and spent a whole morning being interrogated in the police station - I DO NOT want anything else to write about, got it!" All of the boys giggled and I was happy I'd diffused the tension that had followed me into the car.
Arriving at a foreign airport in the middle of the night is always a fun experience. I'd never been to this airport, didn't know where I was supposed to go, and really had no clue what the protocol was like. After asking several people, standing in lines looking like a lost, dumb tourist (like I really was), and following other people who looked like they knew what was going on I finally made it to my gate - all in one piece.
As the plane taxied on the runway I couldn't help but sit and ponder over the unbelievable experience I'd been apart of and witnessed over the last two weeks. What had I done to deserve something so overwhelming and wonderful? I laid my head back as the engines started building up and closed my eyes. My mind went over each day just like a big screen of instant replay. I wanted to remember every thought, sight, and experience the Lord had blessed me with in this short time. I silently said a prayer of gratitude for the opportunity to be taught such an incredible thing as what I'd just went through over the last two quick weeks. I was grateful most of all to have been allowed to feel how the Savior feels for these little children. There is NO DOUBT in my mind that God loves all children...but I'm as certain as I'm breathing that these orphans - like all other orphans I'm sure - have a special circle of angels who are constantly surrounding them with their love and comfort. Although I never saw them with my eyes....I have no doubt they were always there.
Until the next time.....
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